Yesterday the word Sisyphus kept running through my head. That's all I could think of...Sisyphus...Sisyphus. What does it mean?...Sisyphus...I know I heard it before...Sisyphus...Was it in High School?...Sisyphus...No matter what I was working on...Sisyphus...A woman called to ask me to send her some CDs of the weekend services...Sisyphus...
So I looked it up. According to Wikipedia, Sisyphus was a king punished in Tartarus by being cursed to roll a huge boulder up a hill in Greek mythology.
I thought that is exactly how I feel. Everyday I come into work and push this huge boulder up a huge hill only to come back to work the next day and do it all over again. I'm tired every day. I don't sleep well and I'm emotionally drained. Every single day.
Don't get me wrong. I do enjoy my job. It's just I don't feel this is where I'm supposed to be right now. I feel God's call to be in Arizona.
I told Liz I have this feeling of wanting to be out on the Reservation doing What God wants me to do.
But for now I will keep pushing the boulder up that stinking hill...Sisyphus...I just wish it didn't roll over the top of me each day.
Robert
3 comments:
I am looking forward to the day when God tells you "Move!".
You know, I personally believe doing God's work tends to involve spending all day pushing a boulder up a hill, only to come back the next day and do it over again. I believe this is because we see things as a human being would (of course). We expect to see obvious "progress", but the fact is that we are to leave the "progress" up to God and just do what He calls us to do. When you look at it that way it tends to be less frustrating.
I would have to agree witrh Michael. You are exactly where God wants you to be Robert. I know sometimes it doesn't feel like it, but you are. If he wanted you on the rez right now, you would be there. For whatever His reasoning, you are supposed to be pushing that boulder up the hill right here at KACC, just like someday you eill be pushing it up the hill on the rez. He must be strengthening your muscles for something big, so take pride iin pushing knowing that He has a greater plan for you. You are currently in trining for the next big push;) Love you bunches!!
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